If you’ve read any of my postings relating to socio-political issues, you know what side of the fence (no pun intended) I veer towards in the immigration battle. My family is French, Spaniard, Italian, Puerto Rican and Jewish with the possibility of some African thrown in for good measure … (my apologies to the dead ancestors from Af-crap-istan that I forgot to mention). This nation is composed mostly of immigrants, and the only real Americans are the poor ****ers with Casino Indian Tribes as their claim to fame. Yep, even those funky white boys from around Virginia who are responsible for kicking Britain’s ass during the revolutionary war were, yep, sons or grandchildren of immigrants. Legally or illegally, that’s what they were. Can we all agree on that? (Amen! Goes the crowd!). They humped it over the Behring Straight, Rowed across the north Atlantic pond, came in slave ships, or dropped in from planet Lovetron, … immigrants the lot of them, I tell ya’… Can we all agree on that? A ton of them came “legally”, whatever that word means in the context of that point in history. A ton of them came illegally, or without any significant process pursuant to whatever laws of entry existed. Can we all agree on that? Good, now that I got that boring preamble out of the way,… let me tell you the theme of this post. I used to be for a fence on the border, not just the southern one, but the northern one too, what the hell. But now I feel that...
...A BORDER FENCE WON’T WORK! and the top 5 reasons why I changed my mind about it. (I can do that, right?)
1. The imagery. I know, I'm wussying-out here, but I can't wrap my frontal lobe around the Statue of Liberty saying "Bring me your weak, your hungry and your tired" while at the same time building a massive wall to keep those very mentioned out, regardless of the legal implications. Keep reading please, my twisted logic will make sense in a few paragraphs.
2. Show me a 25 foot high fence, and I'll show you a 26 foot ladder. Trust me on this one. I can jump any fence given enough motivation and desperation to do so. People climbed over the Berlin freaking’ wall in search of liberty, food, freedom etc,… many getting shot, maimed, killed, tortured or imprisoned in the process. Tell me that if you are on one side of the fence, your family is hungry and victim of your Government's corruption or political ethos; that you won’t do whatever it takes to feed your little ones, laws or no laws, borders or no borders. A barrier has never kept a highly motivated human from getting to wherever the hell he wants to go. Don’t believe me?... who the hell did the Great Wall of China ever deter from hoping over?... and that puppy is 1500 miles long, 25 feet, high, 30 feet thick at the bottom and 12 feet thick at the top,… do you think we have to moxy, money or sack to build a monstrosity like that? No, right? So what makes you think that a lesser-sized monolithic fence can work?
3. The money. Sorry to be such as cheap-ass, tight-fisted Libertarian but I'll make a trade for ya'. I'll give you your 2,000 mile fence from Brownsville to San Diego, if you give me back the 4 Aircraft Carrier Groups (that are not needed), lop-off the ¾-ths of the intelligence community bureaucracy (see my intelligence post back in May of 2006), kill all federal and state taxes on gasoline,... forever!, and while you’re at it, let me invest all my FICA deductions into my 401K and investment funds. Ok, now you can have your damned fence.
4. The Feds aren't prosecuting ANYBODY! The raid on the pallet company? Please, that was a joke!. 45 minutes after they arrested 1200 people, 70% of them were back at the Home Depot parking lot playing dominoes and offering their services at a discount. Until the U.S. Government grows a pair and starts to really lay the lumber on employers who do not follow the law it is not going to diminish the volume of illegal’s coming in one iota.
5. The 14th Amendment (THE REAL REASON). Instant Citizenship for persons born on U.S. soil is the real prize here, Sparky. That is the holy grail of achievements for illegals. Think of it. Who in their right moral mind is going to expel an illegal whose children are US citizens? Nobody, period. The politicos can talk all the shit they want, but the day CNN cameras start rolling with children screaming as they board the Aero Mexico buses to the border, it will be like Elian Gonzalez, but in reverse. The World court of opinion (not that I care too much for it, by the way) will crucify us so fast that deportations will stop faster that you can say Britney Spears has issues. The PC crowd, the Church, the left wing, the ACLU, they will go ape! THAT is were the bullet hits the bone. Even Canadians, those monoliths of liberal dogma knocked that law out of the hockey arena when Chinese immigrants were flying in by the tens of thousands just to give birth on Canadian soil. Sorry said the Royal Mounties, no more social programs for non-citizens (what???), Earn your damn citizenship, they said, the statue of Liberty is in New York not in Quebec. (Why did that not make the news?) Until WE knock that obsolete, cleverly-guised and stupidly created Civil War-era law from the Constitution nothing is going to stop the crossings. Not a fence, not the military, not even Paris Hilton and Angelina Jolie posing naked in Tijuana with signs that say "What happens in Mexico, stays in Mexico" will put an end to the burrito express.
Memo to the Prez, soon to be the lamest of all Ducks in the proverbial DC pond. Just do numbers 4 and 5 for me and the fence won't be needed. Six to eight million will slowly go home by attrition over 5 years because they would have no reason to stay. No legal work, no citizenship, no public education for their kids, no free hospital care at taxpayer expense. Nothing. The gravy train would have left the station. Persons not here legally will leave on their own, with a measure of dignity, of free-will, ... and maybe, maybe the inertia created by the reverse-flow will create change in the nation that has so deserted their own citizens by using the economic might of the north as their excuse not to change. Maybe that will finally force a few Banana Republics full of juntas and oligarchies to get their shit together or face a real revolution in their own yard.
Yeah, I know... Truth-Pain is insensitive, mean-spirited, an isolationist pig, in-humane, hardened to the human condition, stupid, xenophobic and more dangerous than Attila the Hun. Truth-Pain has no compassion. Tune-in next week,... I got your compassion right here....
Quick,... somebody take away my keyboard before I influence 20 million people....